I’ve gotten a lot of media attention lately and rightfully so. I am the ONLY presidential candidate who can make America great again! I’ve made billions and billions of dollars in the private sector and I will bring that massive success to the Oval Office. I can run a business better than anyone else in the world, and I can easily run the country.
So, you might be wondering what America needs to be great again. What do we need to jumpstart our economy? Time! We need more time. Not just any time, we need the time that is rightfully OURS!
Last week, as my assistant was waiting on hold with AT&T while he was rubbing my feet, I thought to myself, “I really wish we could build an inexpensive wall to keep those damn Mexicans out of America…” But, then I moved on from that and thought, “Everybody should have an assistant like mine.” Brilliant! I’ve created a plan to create a government-operated phone service where “assistants” can deal with insurance companies, cable companies and phone companies, so middle-class Americans don’t have to. By consolidating millions of wasted hours, the economy will start running on all cylinders overnight! The brains of the American public will be free to do what they do best. We can be more productive and more innovative, then we can return this country to greatness! Also, this new program will create thousands of jobs for unemployed Americans. Or, we could just make illegal immigrants do the work. Either way, it’s a win-win!
You might say, “That sounds complicated, Donald.” Well, America, it’s really not. The government already has all of your personal information, so it’s really the next logical step. Let us help you, so you can concentrate on the much more important parts of life.
Well, I can explain all the details more at a later time. Right now I have a riveting New York Liberty game to go to tonight and I can’t be late. I love the WNBA! Thanks for reading!
– Not Written By… Donald Trump